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Why Are Christians So Judgemental and Hateful Sometimes? Why Hate?

One of the common criticisms I hear about Christianity is that people often feel as if Christians “hate” people, and are very judgemental. This, in some ways, is true. However, in some ways, it isn’t true. In this article, I will attempt to explain why Christians give off this vibe, and are sometimes mislabeled as “hateful or judgemental.” I will also explain why sometimes we are (admittedly) very judgemental.

Why Christians Hate People? Do They Really Hate People?

Whenever we say the word “Christians, it is hard to define each individual that claims to be a Christian. After all, one Christian may behave very differently from another. We are all unique with our own beliefs and personalities. I have known some amazing Christians, who made me want to work harder to be like them because they set such a great example.

In contrast, I have known some not-so-great Christians who made me feel disappointed in their actions or behaviors. So there is a very broad group of people within the Christian community, and it is important not to impose labels on Christianity as a whole, based on one person. In fact, Christianity should be based on one person’s actions alone: Jesus Christ. If you want to know how Christianity SHOULD be, and what a true Christian is, look at Jesus and only Jesus. Don’t look at me, your friend, or your local church.

But sometimes a Christian may seem as if they are hating against a certain group, or certain belief. Why is that? I’ll explain. Do you remember being in school, and there was always a “teacher’s pet?” You know who I am talking about, that person who always followed the rules. Who did everything by the book. Who also probably told on people who didn’t follow the rules….you get the idea.

Why did they do this? The answer is that there is simply something in human nature, that makes us all feel that when someone isn’t following the “rules,” it is wrong (especially when we take effort to follow them ourselves). When we work hard to live by a standard, we often expect others to do the same. It isn’t just Christianity, EVERY person and EVERY religion does this.

It doesn’t matter what it is. Imagine you go to work and plan on working really hard. Then, you see a fellow employee slacking. It probably frustrates you doesn’t it? You are holding yourself to a very high work standard, and when you see someone slacking off, you get frustrated and judgemental. In that same way, Christians are trying to be as “spiritually” hard working as possible. When they see someone slacking spiritually, they often want to help correct them, or may even make judgements about their behavior.

Christianity often sticks out in this regard. Why? Because many Christians have a very high level of morality defined in their mind. When they experience something in society that goes against this morality (and thus goes against God), they see this a very negative thing. Considering we are inundated with immorality, it makes for a frequent dynamic of criticisms from Christians.

You probably do the same thing on a daily basis, regardless of your own personal beliefs. For example, if I told you that a man down the street was molesting kids all the time, how would you feel about him? You would probably be disgusted wouldn’t you? You would look at him differently, and probably think his actions are highly inappropriate. Most people in society would.

Since Christians have a very strict moral code in mind for humanity, they do this same thing. Only, things like adultery, sexual promiscuity, homosexuality, pornography, and other things that are accepted as “normal” by many secular society members is believed to be “immoral” and wrong by Christians.

So Christians often allow this morality to affect their actions and beliefs in life. If they hear someone is doing something immoral, or trying to legalize something immoral, they can become quite vocal and express their opinion, sometimes pass judgements, and so forth.

So Do Christians Hate Non-Christians or Sinners?

God hates sin. Christians hate sin.

I hate the sins I have committed in my life. I absolutely hate them and regret them all. I am very judgemental towards my past sins, and realize how foolish I was. But does that mean I hate myself? Of course not.  Sins aren’t fun, and nothing good ever comes from sin. Sin leads to misery and death.

But that doesn’t mean that we hate people who sin. We hate the sin they do. We hate the affect of sin in people’s lives and in society. But we don’t hate the sinning people, per se. We have all sinned at some point. The bible says all men have fallen short of the glory of God.

One of the most famous sermons of Jesus gave was, “love your enemies.” That is powerful. Christians aren’t taught to “hate” sinners or hate people like some suggest. We are taught to love even our direct enemies! Wow. That is difficult.

But Christians are also taught to be wary of sin. To avoid sinful behavior, and stay on the narrow path in life. We are even told to avoid close associations with sinners, and to be a “light” for the world.

Because of this, we don’t think sin is cute, funny, or appropriate. We don’t tolerate sin being paraded around or celebrated. We also tend to look at any and all sins in the same way a non-religious person looks at a deranged serial killer. We think all sins are wrong and totally inappropriate. We struggle daily to resist the temptation to sin, and sometimes, fall short ourselves and we must then repent and turn away from sin.

Because we are so “aware” of sin, we often pass judgements and discernment’s on people, actions, and so forth.

Doesn’t the Bible Say Not to Judge? Why Do Christians Judge People?

It is true that Jesus told us the following:

“Do not judge, or you too will be judged.  For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?—-Matthew 7:1-5

From the reading of this passage, it is clear that we shouldn’t be hypocrites when judging. In other words, if we say homosexuality is wrong, we should NOT go home and then engage in a homosexual relationship. If we say adultery is wrong, we better not be cheating on our spouses. And yes, there are some hypocrites in Christianity. But not all Christians judge hypocritically. Many judge appropriately.

The bible actually commands that we don’t judge HYPOCRITICALLY. It doesn’t say that we shouldn’t judge and discern behavior and people. In fact, it actually suggests that we should several times.

Matthew 7:15 tells us to do the following:

 “Watch out for false prophets. They come to you in sheep’s clothing, but inwardly they are ferocious wolves.

How would we know if someone was a “false prophet” unless we make judgements and discernments about their teachings and actions? We couldn’t! So must be able to judge people’s actions and teachings.

Again, in Romans 16:17 we find the following:

I urge you, brothers, to watch out for those who cause divisions and put obstacles in your way that are contrary to the teaching you have learned. Keep away from them.

And in 1 Colossians 5 we see:

 9 I have written you in my letter not to associate with sexually immoral people—  10 not at all meaning the people of this world who are immoral, or the greedy and swindlers, or idolaters. In that case you would have to leave this world.  11 But now I am writing you that you must not associate with anyone who calls himself a brother but is sexually immoral or greedy, an idolater or a slanderer, a drunkard or a swindler. With such a man do not even eat.

What business is it of mine to judge those outside the church? Are you not to judge those inside?  13 God will judge those outside. “Expel the wicked man from among you.”

In the verses above we see that again we are supposed to exercise caution, and a discerning judgment against all people, and even a stronger judgement for actual believers. Otherwise, how would we know if they were sexually immoral, greedy, or anything else unless we made that judgment about them in our mind?

Notice how Paul says that “God will judge those outside the church.” He is referring to the “Great Judgement” here. He is not saying we should not exercise caution and discerning judgment ourselves from ALL people. We should. He is simply saying that God will deal with those who reject him in the judgment, and Christians should help keep Christians in line by constantly encouraging, judging, and correcting each other when necessary. It is also important to judge ourselves.

Conclusion: All People Make Judgements, Not Just Christians. We Hate Sin, but Not Sinners

In conclusion, Christians hate sin, not sinners. We are told to love our enemies. At the same time, we are told to stay away from sinful behavior, to stay on the narrow path, and to keep God’s laws in our hearts and minds.

Thus, because we strive to do this, we must constantly judge ourselves and others’ behavior. We must correct sin in ourselves, and help instruct others of sins they may be doing.

This often gives Christians a label as if we are judgemental. Of course we are. I have yet to meet 1 human being of any religion that isn’t judgmental about something or someone. And the bible actually commands us to judge (just not hypocritically). Discerning things is a part of the human experience. We all think and reason, and because of this, we all make judgements daily, hourly, sometimes by the minute.

So yes, we judge sometimes. People have judged me in the past, which really made me upset. Until I had a reality check and realized they were right. Then, I was glad they pointed it out. It allowed me to improve myself, and become a better Christian.

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Are You a Compartmentalized Christian? Judge Yourself!

Recently, a guy by the name of Phillip Garrido was found to have allegedly kidnapped, raped, and fathered children with a young girl (Jaycee Duggard). As I read the chilling story in the news, I was absolutely shocked and disgusted.

How could anyone do something so terrible to an innocent child? How could a grown man allegedly kidnap a young girl, hold her captive, rape her, and more for years and years?

But just as I thought the story couldn’t get any worse, it did. I found out that this man was using the “G” word quite a bit. What “G” word is it? God.

This man who was allegedly keeping a kidnapped woman captive in a small shed in his backyard for years, was talking about “God this” and “God that”. As I researched it more, I found that he was even attempting to start some type of ministry! Wow. I was horrified.

I found myself in complete and utter shock. Obviously, I don’t know every detail, and only God can truly judge someone, but it struck me as so odd that this man could actually think he was religious and following God, while at the same time allegedly doing some of the worst sins listed in the Bible. Why was that? How can someone attempt to start a religion about God, while doing things God says not to do? How can one confess Christianity, but bear ungodly fruit?

I can’t even begin to try and unravel what kind of psychological problems Mr. Garrido might have, but I do know this: He was compartmentalizing his life in an extreme way, and many Christians today do the same (albeit, not as extreme). In fact, a compartmentalizing  sinning Christian often gives Christianity a bad name.

What Is Compartmentalization, and Why Should We Guard Ourselves From It?

We all know what a compartment is, right? It is defined as a space in which an area is subdivided. If you can imagine a house diagram, each room is a “compartment” within the entire space of the house.

house diagram

So bedroom 1 is a compartment (where you sleep), the kitchen is another compartment (where you eat), the bathroom is a compartment, etc. etc.

Humans have a tendency to compartmentalize things in their life. They act a certain way at a job, then another way with friends, another way with relatives, and so forth. Their values, attitudes, beliefs,  and language may change depending on their environment.

Sometimes it can be natural or even acceptable to compartmentalize your general behavior. You wouldn’t exactly speak about the same topics to your grandparents in the same way you may speak to your spouse.

But sometimes this can be abused, and people can compartmentalize their faith. This is why we hear of preachers who were having homosexual relationships, while preaching from the pulpit against homosexuality. This is why someone can kidnap a girl, and yet think they are doing God’s will.

It is also why you may see someone claiming to be a Christian on a myspace or facebook page, while reading about how much sex they had out of wedlock last weekend…

It is dangerous to compartmentalize your faith, and we should all seek to remove this behavior.

The problem with some Christians today is that they think Christianity or spirituality is something you can take and throw in to a “compartment.” They then compartmentalize their entire life separately from their faith and beliefs. They may have promiscuous sex throughout the week, look at pornography, lie, steal,  curse, do drugs, etc. all while saying they are “born again Christians.”

The bible says NOT to do those things…so if a person really believes in God, why do they still do it? Surely they must realize that God will judge them, right?

What they are doing is living a compartmentalized spiritual life. They have a compartment of spirituality that rarely gets opened. But then, when it comes Sunday, they walk into the “spiritual” compartment of their lives. They sing hymns, chant about God, listen to a sermon, pray, and then go home.

Afterwards, they leave their safe Christian “compartment” yet again and go back to whatever behavior they were doing before. They think it is okay to sin as long as you show up on Sundays, or profess that you are a Christian. They just make sure to occasionally visit the Christian compartment from time to time.

Unfortunately, it just doesn’t work that way folks. Christianity is NEVER to be compartmentalized. If you compartmentalize your faith, you risk failing judgement of God. You risk being guilty of sin on judgment day. Because God surely isn’t going to judge only your “Christian life.” God will judge you based on your ENTIRE life.

The Christian faith isn’t a compartment or room in a house to be kept secret or hid away. It is the foundation on which the house should sit. It is the foundation by which you build your entire life, and every compartment must sit on your faith.

That means you let your faith bleed through every single area of your life. You should be a Christian at work, with friends and enemies, with your spouse, on your Myspace or Twitter, behind closed doors, and every living and breathing second of your life.

You should live for God, breathe for God, sing for God, read about God, pray to God, fear God, strive to be Godly, and yes, even Tweet about God.  How hypocritical is it to talk about a sinner in one breath, while sinning yourself in the next? How hypocritical is it to claim you are a Christian, while in the next paragraph bragging about a recent sin?

Be Brutally Honest, and Judge Yourself

We can avoid creating a Christian compartment in our minds if we are brutally honest when we judge ourselves. I mean even more brutally honest than Simon Cowell from American Idol. We must be brutally honest, and not make excuses for our shortcomings or sins. In addition, we must strive to allow our faith to regulate all areas of our lives.

We cannot be Christians some or even most of the time. We are called to follow Christ 100% of the time.

The bible speaks about judging ourselves:

For if we would judge ourselves, we should not be judged.

-1 Corinthians 11:31

So how do we judge ourselves? We read the bible, and let God’s laws into our minds. We then use the criteria in the bible, and judge ourselves based on those standards.

For example, the bible says we shouldn’t lie. Therefore, we should be brutally honest and ask, “Have I told a lie recently? Am I a liar? Was I dishonest about something?

If we did lie, then we have an obligation to repent, and turn away from that behavior in the future. We should constantly be judging our own actions to ensure they line up with scriptures. When they go against God’s will, we must admit that and repent.

Christianity is not a one time contract you sign and then you are done. I only wish it were that easy. It is a daily struggle. Every day we are confronted with new situations, new temptations, and new frustrations. And every day we must do our very best to follow God’s will for each situation.

This, in my opinion, is the hardest part of Christianity. Anyone can label themselves as a Christian. That is the easy part. But struggling against sin daily is so very hard. We have all fallen short of the glory of God (me included), and we must all judge ourselves and reveal our shortcomings and sins. We all have an obligation to repent from our sins, and admit our mistakes.

This is so hard to do. When I find that I have sinned, I feel terrible. I feel angry (at myself), I feel like I have failed God. I certainly know that feeling of realizing and admitting to a sin or shortcoming. But it is something we must do. I would much rather judge myself and have a chance to repent, than to be judged by God without a chance of repentance.

We must judge ourselves regularly, fully, and truthfully. We cannot afford to have our faith placed in a nice box in our minds, only to be opened when we want to feel warm and fuzzy. We must let our faith rule our lives.

If we place our spiritual life in a “faith” compartment in our minds, isolated away from other behavior or activity, then it automatically means we have other compartments which are not bound by that faith. Those other compartments are free to sin unrestrained.

Instead, we must build all compartments on our faith, so that our faith is exposed in all areas of our lives. God laid the foundations of the universe by His words, and we should build our lives on the foundation of God’s words. Every thought or action should be governed by our faith. We should always walk in the light of God. For if we walk in the light, then we can have confidence in the promise of our Lord.

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